Last updated: June 8, 2025
Congratulations on Your Dedication to Legal Fine Print
Congratulations, you've found the Terms of Use page for a website that provides no services and has no users except readers of content. This is peak legal nerd behavior and I respect the commitment.
What You Can Do
- Read the articles
- Share them with people
- Quote them (with attribution, obviously)
- Disagree with my legal analysis
- Email me to tell me I'm wrong about something
- Use this information to sound smart at dinner parties
What You Shouldn't Do
- Copy entire articles and pretend you wrote them
- Use my information to harass people
- Sue me if the government doesn't follow my predictions
- Expect me to be your lawyer (I'm not your lawyer, not yet anyway)
- Try to hack the website (it's just a Squarespace site, there's nothing interesting here)
What You Waive By Being Here
By entering my website, you have waived your right to sue me for defamation, libel, slander, intentional or negligent infliction of emotional distress (aka, "fuck your feelings, snowflake"), or possession of a marmot within city limits without registration. Also, if you do sue me and I win (which I will), you agree to pay my attorneys' fees. This is not legal nonsense.
The "I'm Not Your Lawyer" Section
This website contains legal analysis and commentary. It is not legal advice. I am your attorney if you retain me, but just reading this website doesn't create an attorney-client relationship. If you want paid legal advice, I'm currently available and reasonably priced.
Warranties and Disclaimers
This website and all content are provided "as is" without warranty of any kind, either express or implied, including but not limited to the implied warranties of merchantability, fitness for a particular purpose, and non-infringement. I make no representation or warranty that the information is accurate, complete, or current. The entire risk as to the quality and performance of the website is with you. If you rely on something I wrote here to make important legal decisions, that's on you. I'm just a person with opinions and a Squarespace subscription. First Amendment!
Accuracy Disclaimer
That said, I try to be as accurate as possible and generally acknowledge the known unknowns. The unknown unknowns always get you no matter how hard you try. I'm not here to defame anyone (but, of course, you already waived that away). Sometimes I may get things wrong. Sometimes courts do unexpected things. Sometimes the law is just weird. If you think you found an error, email me and I'll consider it.
Copyright Stuff
Everything on this site is mine unless I say otherwise. You can quote it, link to it, and generally treat it like normal internet content. Just don't steal my text and not provide attribution.
If you want to republish something substantial, just ask. I'll probably say yes.
Changes to These Terms
I might update these terms if I think of something clever to add. Or if my artificial intelligence service tells me to add something. I won't email you, my unregistered user, about it - just check back if you're really curious.
Governing Law and Venue
These terms are governed by the laws of Washington, D.C. Any legal disputes arising from or related to this website must be brought exclusively in the courts of Washington, D.C. If you want to sue me, you have to come to D.C. to do it. No forum shopping allowed.
Questions about these terms? Email me at emailfromarealdumbass@govoversight.net.
That's it. Now go read something about actual government oversight instead of legal fine print.